Okay... because of the talk about Davis on Tricia's & Jae's blogs... it makes me think... & wonder what would have happened if I went to Davis...
I know this is stupid but put yourself in my place and you'd probably feel the same way... but then one of the reasons I was thinking of going to Davis was the simple fact that I got in... and other people applied and didn't get in but I did... did that mean something? It felt like I was passing up a coveted opportunity by not going...
Cept I didn't want to go to Davis. Five hundred people in one lecture class? No thanks, I'll pass. I can't learn like that. Obviously many people can, otherwise they wouldn't be going and graduating from UCs and states & stuff... yeah I think in like sometime last spring I went to Davis to try and convince myself into going there... I like how it rained when I visisted... I don't know I felt like I wanted to cry because I knew my parents wanted me to go there but I really really didn't... & the school I wanted to go to cost so much more and I felt really bad... I felt stuck.
I don't know why I posted this, honestly. I'm not feeling well... and I don't mean physically unwell. :sigh: I wonder if I'd feel better or worse if I was @ Davis... maybe I'd be slightly more social or something... I don't know... I don't know...
Special thanks goes out to Joe, Jami, and Luana... for telling me things that supposedly everyone else feels, but assumes that I know it, so they don't bother saying it... Joe for talking to me, for confiding in me, for making me feel like my prescence means something.... Jami for making me laugh, smile, sharing in my problems, reminding me that I'm not alone in my feelings... Luana for being you for so long... for being my sister throughout the past fourteen years, for not judging me and letting me be me, and being there for me throughout everything we've been through...
Appreciation is so underrated. Doesn't anyone realize how everyone's self esteem levels would be if we showed each other how much we appreciated each other more??
I know this is stupid but put yourself in my place and you'd probably feel the same way... but then one of the reasons I was thinking of going to Davis was the simple fact that I got in... and other people applied and didn't get in but I did... did that mean something? It felt like I was passing up a coveted opportunity by not going...
Cept I didn't want to go to Davis. Five hundred people in one lecture class? No thanks, I'll pass. I can't learn like that. Obviously many people can, otherwise they wouldn't be going and graduating from UCs and states & stuff... yeah I think in like sometime last spring I went to Davis to try and convince myself into going there... I like how it rained when I visisted... I don't know I felt like I wanted to cry because I knew my parents wanted me to go there but I really really didn't... & the school I wanted to go to cost so much more and I felt really bad... I felt stuck.
I don't know why I posted this, honestly. I'm not feeling well... and I don't mean physically unwell. :sigh: I wonder if I'd feel better or worse if I was @ Davis... maybe I'd be slightly more social or something... I don't know... I don't know...
Special thanks goes out to Joe, Jami, and Luana... for telling me things that supposedly everyone else feels, but assumes that I know it, so they don't bother saying it... Joe for talking to me, for confiding in me, for making me feel like my prescence means something.... Jami for making me laugh, smile, sharing in my problems, reminding me that I'm not alone in my feelings... Luana for being you for so long... for being my sister throughout the past fourteen years, for not judging me and letting me be me, and being there for me throughout everything we've been through...
Appreciation is so underrated. Doesn't anyone realize how everyone's self esteem levels would be if we showed each other how much we appreciated each other more??
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