Secret Santa Wishlist... (check for updates!)

- chunky cable knit scarf from Nordstrom (any color)
- MAC Plushglass in Big Kiss, Fulfilled, Plus Luxe, or Ample Pink
- Bandolino flats, size 5.5, red suede
- zip up hoodies, size xs or s
- Itunes giftcard
- Sephora giftcard
- Nordstrom giftcard
- See's vanilla nut caramels
- Clinique clarifying lotion 3 (the pink one)
- skinny jeans, size 2 short, gray, black, or dark blue



=D Shop Happy!!

LOL i think i won an autographed 8x10 teddy grieger poster!

hi. @ work. killin me. totally feels like i cant take a lunch break, the way people keep poppin in here with work for me. whats a girl gotta do to enjoy her baon while skimming through pink is the new blog??

anyways. i havent blogged in what feels like awhile. has it been? i ate lunch at google last thursday. free food everywhere. and there are massage chairs. and naked juice. and haribo gummy bears. all sorts of funn, with two n's. & everyone's in flip flops. i wish i could be in flip flops. anyways, the whole time i was there, i'd be passing by people and in my head, im just thinking... you're smarter than me... and you're smarter than me... and you probably got a 1560 or something on your SATs... and you probably went to an ivy league... and you could probably beat me in jeopardy... so could you...

ugh. law school. i'm so not competitive. if i could get in, i hope i could hang.

uhm. saw the break up. it was ok. michael & i kept poking one another when something especially resonated with us. i dont remember what else...

im spending like a mofo and it sucks. im not supposed to go shopping in the next two weeks, just groceries and necessities. clinique and nordys and metro park and not necessities. cha & steph, i got the bonus gift. haven't tried the lip glosses yet but i did put them on the c keychain.

sorry this is so dry. totally feels like a monday around here. yes, i have a case of the maundays.

headed to sf tonight. its fifteen degrees colder there. i get to advise the politics kiddies.

can it just be july 27th already please??

so google has heated toilets and that function that "cleanses" that area. i was NOT expecting what happened. scary.

what other good radio stations stream online? i played kiss 98.1 for awhile but then i got tired of hearing "car wash" and "brick house" over and over again. now i'm on alice 97.3... turning it down whenever james blunt or daniel powter come on. yuck.

jae, what do you want for your birfday? alcohol, clothes, motorcycle stuff...?

that sprint commercial where the two guys are dancing to salt n pepa "push it" makes me laugh & smile even when i was feeling like ass bc of a jerk. thank you myspace.

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY CHARLIANE. i heart you bestest friend in the universe. i'll be sending you something soon. drink your water and pepcid ac.

did i say belle & i went to the kenny chesney concert? i missed carrie underwood as the opening act, but yeah, kenny's effin awesome. say what you will about country music, but they play their instruments, there's not so much of that dancing dancing that isnt so awesome (not as awesome as high school musical, anyways... and yes, im hella serious about that =) )... but yeah, these country people perform their asses off. i can't even explain how excited i am for rascal flatts, my favourite. wayyyy jazzed. jazz hands a la dane cook looking through the window jazzed.

i am a little bummed right now tho. and work just makes me really mentally tired, which is sad, cause this summer, i wanted to tackle the big bad lsat prep book. my dad asked me today what law schools back east i was thinking about. on father's day, my father insinuated about wanting me on the other side of the country. fantastic. that's not why i'm bummed, but i guess it could contribute if i felt like it... i always talked about applying eastwards for school, & i'll admit, i was in that phase where... where i was craving attention and, immaturely, i was feeling that if i was gone, on the other side of the country, people would miss me, and then i'd feel wanted, cause i wasnt feeling wanted at the time...

do i feel wanted now? more than i did back then, i'll admit that. ugh, now i have the butterflies in my stomach that i get whenever i think about law school and lsats and applying and getting in and moving far away for school... i really dont want to leave california, especially for school, cause all the schools i want to go to will help me prepare for the california bar test, which is the hardest in the country, tied with new york. if i passed it, i'd be kicking unknown ass...

i guess i know im smart, but i know that i am a limited smart. i know that i probably wouldnt get on jeopardy if i auditioned, as much as i heart that show and all of the trivia. i know that i'm never going to get straight A's, never going to get anything higher than a 3.6 out of college... i know that i will never be "the best". i know i can be my personal best, but i'm not competitive, and i don't care to be, really. i just want to do what i know im capable of. and i don't get myself down about not being the best or perfect or getting into a top fifty law school. it's just what it is.

i guess my being bummed out put me into a reflective mood where all of you intrusive people can read my mind tonight. that's ok; i think i know who reads this, and i don't mind you knowing. hell, i even know that some of you dont have the patience to read through my paragraphs, so this might just go right past you. whatevs (my sister hates it when i say that).

i know where i expect myself to fail... like, i know my shortcomings, and i'm okay with all of them. it is what it is. but when other people think they know my shortcomings... and they hold me to them no matter what... i hate that. i really do. i don't like being expected to fail. if i know im going to fail, i'm not even going to try. but if i'm going to try, i'd like to be given the chance with an open mind before anything else.

with the family... i can't win. i would have thought that what im doing at the end of the year would be cause for so much more... well, respect. but... my shortcomings are being focused upon and talked about instead. and that makes me feel like isht. i know that's how it is with filipino families, how you can do your best and get straight a's and nothing happens, but when it doesn't happen, best believe you'll hear hell about it. it's a no win situation. i'm not saying they have to mention it all the time or brag about it to their friends or whatever, but just seriously, cut me some effing slack. i'm working my ass off here, and i wish i didnt feel like it was just for me.

dude, people who get skin cancer and still stay out in the sun are hella stupid. it's like people who get std's and still sleep around without some glovin'. whats up...

=( goodnight.

hi. so even though i've done the forty hour work week work every summer since 2004, this is the first summer where i'm literally working the whole eight hours... through my breaks... with a computer in my face... but seriously no time to look at pink is the new blog and/or the menu for the cafes to decide what i'll be having for lunch. my first summer, i'd literally sit for an hour straight, doing nothing, bc there was no work to be done. but yeah... all over now. and i actually did overtime last saturday. i haven't worked a saturday since jvc. it was just a couple of hours, but i did get to wear flip flops =) . my dream is to have a job where i can wear flip flops. ha... i'm dreaming of a legal job, working 60 weeks, in my havaianas. awesome.

anyways. by the time i get home im super lazy... dont want to cook... it's hard right now to use the computer too cause i've been staring at one for eight hours. i still prefer my ibook to my work laptop any day. it's been some work getting used to the right click concept once again. what's this i hear about a black apple laptop? it's hella cute. hot damn.

tomorrow i will be helping to bake eighty something cupcakes. saturday, i will help put blue cream cheese frosting on it (not bleu cheese frosting. blue cream cheese)

is it time for disneyland yet??

even tho i still get butt hurt about things... i have to say i'd prefer people be honest to me rather than just not say anything at all.. yeah the truth hurts, but there's a good way to say it... a tactful way. you odn't have to be blunt or cruel, and yeah, it may not be the nicest thing, but you don't have to overly sugarcoat things... just be straight up. i'm not about to read the tone of your voice... even if you're not interested in what i have to say, i'd rather have a response that'll signal me that you're not interested than no response at all. i just feel more respected when im spoken to... you know? and then i learn from it. i get the whole if you dont have anything nice to say, dont say anything at all... but if you're too afraid to tell me no, then who will?? and what does that teach me? i'd rather be butt hurt but feel respected rather than to be just nodded to silently. whatever.

sorry. maybe it's my hunger pangs talking.

i don't need to be surrounded by people. i just need to be surrounded by people who care about me. and i dont need attention 24/7. i just need to know that you still care. and you'll try to be there if you could. and you'll be sorry if you can't.

summer's always kinda cruel to me cause i'm away from all of the friends & the bf, and i have to work so much and i don't have any privacy cause i sleep on my sister's couch... but i always feel like i learn something new about myself during the time... plus, light rail in santa clara county has nothing on sf muni... & there's no bart here.

belle gets all the free goodies @ google. i have a google pen, a google small notebook, a google t shirt (that has the logo on the front, & then on the back it says "i'm feeling lucky")... and vitamin water and milano cookies and trident gum and a DR GRIP pen and... ORANGINA. and mocha fraps. for free ninety nine. i can't wait to visit to eat lunch there. oh, bon appetit, look at what you could be.

harrow. i work in a job that actually requires the use of white out every now and then. i actually use white out. for real. like, not for fun. and for fun, i don't mean for painty fumes inhaling, but for like... artsy fun sort of. nm. tangent there. anyways.

at the job right now. i guess you could call this my lunch break. to quote lauren from the hills "a real lunch break??". that was hilarious.

shopped like i finally got a paycheck yesterday. my hair's shorter now too. i'm thinking of putting all of my next paycheck to my credit card cause i feel a little guilty. BUT i have shoes that are practically like house slippers except they're not cause they're all trendy cause i bought them in the bad bad section of nordy's that my sister urged me into. she & my mother... bad influences for buying really cute but expensive stuff. admission: i do like nice things. which makes me very sad about wanting to go into public interest law cause it cannot pay for my nice things inclinations. why can't i help people wearing name brands?

kicked michael's a** at the horse racies @ d&b. i did it sober, too.

i heart the movie cars. i'm sure i annoyed the bf a little by whispering about all of the nascar related incidents throughout the movie. boogedy boogedy boogedy, lets go racin. (speakin of which, congrats to my 26 car on not crashing & being in the top 20.)

kenny chesney tomorrow! =D I should listen to the road & the radio nonstop from now till then to amp up. i'm listening to yahoo launch radio, and I'm stuck listening to mimi cause I've already used my 5 skips for this listening hour.

havaianas (sp? i keep messing it up...) are effin great. i want to own like nine pairs or something.

good luck to the lsat takers today.

I know this shake it off song will be in my head so annoyingly for the rest of the day... urgh. later.

harrow. i work in a job that actually requires the use of white out every now and then. i actually use white out. for real. like, not for fun. and for fun, i don't mean for painty fumes inhaling, but for like... artsy fun sort of. nm. tangent there. anyways.

at the job right now. i guess you could call this my lunch break. to quote lauren from the hills "a real lunch break??". that was hilarious.

shopped like i finally got a paycheck yesterday. my hair's shorter now too. i'm thinking of putting all of my next paycheck to my credit card cause i feel a little guilty. BUT i have shoes that are practically like house slippers except they're not cause they're all trendy cause i bought them in the bad bad section of nordy's that my sister urged me into. she & my mother... bad influences for buying really cute but expensive stuff. admission: i do like nice things. which makes me very sad about wanting to go into public interest law cause it cannot pay for my nice things inclinations. why can't i help people wearing name brands?

kicked michael's a** at the horse racies @ d&b. i did it sober, too.

i heart the movie cars. i'm sure i annoyed the bf a little by whispering about all of the nascar related incidents throughout the movie. boogedy boogedy boogedy, lets go racin. (speakin of which, congrats to my 26 car on not crashing & being in the top 20.)

kenny chesney tomorrow! =D I should listen to the road & the radio nonstop from now till then to amp up. i'm listening to yahoo launch radio, and I'm stuck listening to mimi cause I've already used my 5 skips for this listening hour.

havaianas (sp? i keep messing it up...) are effin great. i want to own like nine pairs or something.

good luck to the lsat takers today.

I know this shake it off song will be in my head so annoyingly for the rest of the day... urgh. later.

joey & ross are drinking midori right now. i heart midori. joey does not. ross does but pretends not to.

on jeopardy! tonight, one of the categories was "hold me closer, tony danza" in reference to elton john's misheard lyric "hold me closer, tiny dancer" in the tiny dancer song. also on friends. hilarious.

Michael & I have been movie watchers, even though he's been stingy and witholding movies that he owes me from his queue and from what he owed me for... I forget what. Either way... yeah. We've been to the movies so often that he knows the words to the songs played in those Century trailers (also popular on Radio Disney). Sorry hon; had to bring it up.

Kenny Chesney concert in a week! =D Yay I get to legally drink at a concert! That Smirnoff Ice @ Keith Urban didn't count, altho it was funn, too. AND I am way excited for Rascal Flatts in July. RASCAL FLATTS; I HEART RASCAL FLATTS. It's like my boy band days, except it's country, so not as widely recognized as bopper. =)

Finished my first week of training today. Good stuff. I heart income.

I think I'm going to read pretentious magazines this summer... Atlantic Monthly. Well, Time's not too presumptuous. The New Yorker. Mixed in with some Lucky, of course. The magazines with the longer articles last longer, and I don't as easily discard of them as I do with the US Weekly's and the Cosmo's.

I need to get out of my habit of starting books & not starting them.

Sorry I'm a little random and dry tonight. Sometimes, you just feel like writing. I saw the Midori on Friends and had the urge to write.

Weekends feel short whether you are in school or working, I have learned.

Ok. I'm done. Sorry for the unenlightening post. Not feeling bitchy nor particularly joyful at this time. Just normal, I suppose. Or average; yes, average.