I hate feeling like this... just upset and depressed a lot... no reason not to... & the minimal good that does happen, it feels like there's too much negative to overpower anything. ugh.

i hate talking to people first. i figure, if they wanted to talk to me, they'd choose to talk to me first.

actually i'm just in a very unsocialble mood right now.

and to completely negate everything that I just said, a special thanks goes out to Marchessa, Jon, & John for just calling me tonight... cause @ first I thought I was being fake happy, cause you know when people call you out of the blue, you don't want the first thing for them to hear is your monotone bitch voice... but yeah, I was so good at being happy fake voice that it became real... & I'm happy that they took the time out of their lives to call me (unlike some people) cause it meant a lot to me that they could think of me, just for that minute or two.

Thanks you guys. Sorry if I was being fake at first, but you really did brighten up my day.